Sex
by Miss Doll
Summary: L and Light having sex and the mess that it creates. Told in short snap shots of time.
1. Part I

Sex

I don't own Death Note.

warning: There is sex. Sorry if you find sex offensive.

Light was fucking sexy. Sexy when he crossed his legs in that hot, demure way, like he was so innocent and pure. He was sexy because of his soft body, the one all wrapped up in sweaters and khakis, like a good boy, covering it up. Oh god, it made L insane with want, so insane with want for that beautiful thing there, right in front of him.

It was so fucking sexy, when he would remove all his clothes, sitting there on L's bed, his pretty young body all soft and ready, ready for L. It was real sexy when he would open that mouth, damn that pretty red mouth was so sweet, like a pin up girl's, lush and plump, and out would come such naughty words, whispered in Light's voice. It was crazy, so crazy, but L craved it. So hot, when he would slip off his boxers (that weren't even boxers, they were more like panties, nice and black, but oh so feminine…), providing L that view he'd wanted the whole day.

"Mmm, L. Come here." He loved that voice he used. He didn't care if Light knew that he was driven solely by his penis, or the fact that Light knew the more he let L take advantage of him, the more L would fall. L just wanted more of that voice, the low whispery breathy one that begged L to fuck him, yet kept him at bay, not until he proved he was worthy.

So L would. He would kiss, and lick, and suck his way around Light's body, pretending that this, like all the other nights, was the first time and he and the teen's young body needed to get acquainted. L thinks Light likes it, because Light likes to feign innocence, like L is this horrible man who is getting his pretty on a pedestal virginity, when they both know L isn't Light's first. Or second. Probably third, but Light can't remember and L is quick to forget things like that.

Light is sensitive around his nipples, so L kisses them hard. He can get so shy when he actually gets aroused, so Light blushes when L does this and lets a few low whispery breathy moans go, for L's self esteem and for his own self indulgence.

L wanted to hear those lips moving, making noises as they parted with a small smack noise. Mmm, yes, more please more, Light, make more sounds. He feels like a high school boy again, coaxing sounds from those girls that used to elude him, before he grew a cock and they grew breasts. He thinks that they are so beautiful and mysterious, these things, and he wants. He wants their secrets, the way he wants Light's secrets. There is no ulterior motive, seeing as he is a man, not a machine, and craves this release like no other. He just wants to sex up that perfect body of Light's and leave him breathless and needy, that whispery breathy voice saying to L all the things he wants.

He is only a man.

Light is demure though, and refuses for a good 5 minutes, making L convince him like he is buying a product. He must present it in a way that does not offend the teen, and makes him want it as much as L. This is never so, because Light doesn't really care whether they do 'it' or not, because he isn't the one suffering, L is. So he hems and hahs, until at last he says whether he wants to or not. This is key for L, because he must act the moment the answer is given, or Light will lose interest and turn away, taking his secrets with him as he puts his clothes back on.

You must understand. Light is a fucking sexy young thing, but he is a fucking cruel bitch when it comes to these things. This makes L want him all the more, so he pushes and pleads, in a way he's never had to, because only Light would refuse L, wouldn't he? Sexy Light, with his soft body that says innocence, with his hot voice that says naughty, says no to L.

You must understand. No one says no to L.

Light's prudish show is all L can stand before he pushes the boy to the bed. He cries out, of course, and protests, many threats of telling his father or leaving, when they both know he can't and he won't. L wouldn't dare let him, because L is stronger than most think. He can hold down the wiggling, writhing body of Light and kiss him into stillness (never submission, because Light never submits…), which is more strength than any of the others Light has wooed before with his pretty eye batting. L thinks he is special because of this.

He is. Light just never tells him.

All foreplay is done. Now it is time for the fucking. Do not mistake this for love making. It is fucking, because L is raging hormonally for Light, the way an adolescent boy would a pop idol, and Light isn't interested in love enough to make it. They fuck.

It only took L two times to find Light's prostate, the little button, he likes to call it that makes Light very not-Light. It makes him flushed pink, his voice now a shriek of pleasure as it gets hit over and over. The sexy mouth, that once told L to stop touching, now begs, begs for L to do more and more. Light wants it.

Slick with sweat, L is moving faster and faster, watching Light's body move in rhythm with him, up and down, in and out. He almost (almost) wishes Light had tits so he could watch them bounce as he assaults the insides of the teen. It's hot, pulsating, and tight in there, his penis hard and huge, so L can't even imagine what it feels like to be Light. It must hurt like fucking hell. Light orders him (Light always orders, never asks…) to go deeper, faster, harder, damn it L, harder. L kisses Light and obeys, sucking on those lips like he is sucking Light's soul. L wants it.

Light cums first tonight. L cums second, riding out the orgasm a little longer than needed. This will cost him points, but Light is to tired to do any of that now. L slides out but Light stops him and tells him to stay in.

"I want to feel you inside me more." L nods and stays. It's sticky and uncomfortable, but very sexy. Light is fucking sexy, even when half asleep and covered with sweat and his own cum. He lays his head on L's chest and winds his hands around L's neck. His hair sticks to the surface of L's (not pale) skin, and L strokes his head, like a friend soothing a sobbing friend. Light doesn't move his head, so L doesn't move his hand. It is the way they work.

L is fucking tired and wants to sleep, but he can't until Light does. He wonders what he will do when Light leaves. Jag off to memories of fucking the teen, or find boys out there that look like him and fuck them like clones, although they'll say yes and he can't have that. Light would say no, just like Light will leave because Light doesn't need L.

L needs Light. Light mumbles some nonsense in his sleep and L stops his thoughts to listen. Light, Light, sexy fucking Light, with his soft body, his pretty eyes, his whispery breathy voice, mumbles carelessly to L about how much he will miss doing this, once he is Kira again. So softly, L responds, sending subconscious shivers down the proverbial back of Kira.

"As will I."

the end

a.n. I wrote this for no one. My world is getting smaller, and I think it might implode sometime soon.

I listened to Airbag (by Radiohead) and my player went into The Real Thing (by Gwen Stefani) almost seamlessly. It was spooky.

I will probably write a companion chapter to this all in Light's pov. It will be mean, because Light is a mean sob.

Please Review…


	2. Part II

Sex

I do not own Death Note.

warning: There is swearing. I'm sorry if swearing offends you. Build a bridge and get over it.

Part II. The Pretty One

Light was always the pretty one. He was always the one who got showered with compliments, who was told that he should be a model, always Light, always pretty. Sayu would puff her cheeks and stare into the mirrors in their house, wondering why the boys slipped their numbers into Light's ass pockets, not her's.

If it were up to Light, he would have all his and L's sexual encounters acted out like soft core pornos, where the girls were soft and delicate (not the nasty things in the intense shit all those guys at his fucking school were into) and the men were nice, sad looking business men who just wanted to fuck and leave to go back to their unhappy lives (and wives). He would wear that soft lingerie, the kind you got at mom and pop sex shops, with the little sheer coats that were lined with the tacky feathers. L would be in nice slacks, a nice shirt, a nice tie, and an ugly overcoat that gave him no shape.

Slowly, he would just slip that off of him and reveal the nice man beneath those layers, the one who would be gentle and kind to Light's pretty form, because he thinks that something like Light is so fucking pretty that if he doesn't handle it with the utmost care, it will break. He will strip Light of his soft lingerie until he is just a pretty thing, naked and wanting. Light wants it like that, where boys didn't just fuck girls because girls made them work for it.

Light makes L work for it. He pushes him away and pretends to be unaffected by L's pleading and kissing. He is. L doesn't know that though. He just thinks Light is a frigid bitch who likes to get his way.

He is, but this is different, of course.

Light expects more from L. He expects him to be a gentleman (he isn't), he expects him to treat Light with some respect (he doesn't), and he expects him to leave the fucking Kira case in the work room (he doesn't he doesn't he doesn't). And since L insists on being a fucking jag off to Light, Light forces him to be a fucking gentleman by withholding what he knows L wants.

S-E-X. Light remembers when that was something that you didn't talk about. (Before boys started climbing in through his window and showing him what they thought of his pretty, soft form…)

"Ugh. I gotta fucking piss." L moves and Light's head hits the bed as L gets up to pee. He just sits there, still and head down on the sheets, like a doll that got forgotten by a little girl. He watches L receding back as it makes its way to the bathroom in their room. He hates that L leaves him.

Light gets up, and follows L to the bathroom, standing in the frame of the door as L unzips his pants to let out his penis. Light hadn't realized in the rush of things that L never took off his clothes. He feels cold being the only naked one in the room. It makes him feel weak, vulnerable. L isn't aiming and misses the toilet. What a fucking slob, Light thinks, knowing all the while that L was staring, staring like always, at Light's body.

He zips up and walks over to where Light is leaning, tilting his body so he hovers above Light, bracing his arm against the wall next to Light's head. Light gives him a look. They only do it once, because that is Light's limit. He's not a fucking trick pony, who will sit there and let L fuck him all night. Once (the quick sessions in the closet while the team isn't there do not count…). L licks his lips and kisses Light all over his face. Light decides there is no harm and kisses back. Passion ensues.

Sometimes Light has horrible nightmares where L doesn't listen to him, and just shoves him up against the wall, taking him from behind and rapes him hard. These dreams leave Light cold and fearful of the man (man, he's a man, a strong, frightening man…) sleeping next to him, holding him in his lean muscled grip. He says it softly to himself that L will never hurt him, but it is an echo, empty and distant, because self assurance doesn't count, he knows.

L's hands are traveling further down, slipping beneath the border of where they should be and gently stroking Light's backside. He shivers. Those fingers need to stay in the safe zone if L wants to keep his fucking genitals attached to his body. They skipped merrily down, closer to Light's entrance. One is going a little too fucking close and…

"Keep your fucking fingers where they're supposed to be L." L is startled, but gets it, and settles his hands on Light's hips, his thumbs rubbing against his skin.

"I just wanna feel you."

"Keep it in your god damn pants L. We just fucking went."

"I wanna go again." Light rolls his eyes and bites L playfully on his shoulder.

"I know, you ass, but I don't want to. So we aren't fucking going again." L chuckles and buries his head into junction between Light's neck and shoulder, nipping it with his lips. They rock back and forth, back and forth, Light standing naked, arms wrapped around L's neck, and L, with his white shirt and jeans still on, his hand steadily rocking Light's hips against his. It is nice. It is peaceful. It is not what Light is used to, which is why Light keeps L around. Because he is not what Light is used to.

One hand falls from L's neck and grasps his hand, pulling on it lightly. L looks up and is guided slowly by Light back to the bed. L flops down onto the bed while Light searches the floor for his boxers (which are really panties he stole from Sayu, just don't tell L…), just so he is somewhat covered.

"You know what would be fucking hot?"

Light doesn't even answer these questions anymore. They usually have to do with him and having tits. L has a thing about tits. It's weird, but Light doesn't ask.

"It would be so fucking hot if you had tits, big ones, so I could titty fuck you."

"You are a fucking dickhead." L snickers and sits up, not even slumped like he is in the work room. He told Light he fakes it, just to piss people off. The weird speech patterns and the hunch and the hair, all a sham just so L could get off on seeing the people he worked with get in a fuss. The sweets were real, unfortunately. L is actually really tall, which you would never think anyways. He is gangly, like a teenager.

"Yes. But I am your fucking dickhead." Light smirks and slips on his boxer (panties), climbing back into bed with his fucking dickhead of a lover. He lets his head and body fall back onto L. L strokes his hair and lets him sit, pretending that they aren't pretending to be in love, pretending that when this is over he won't leave Light alone in Japan while he gallivants off around the world, seeing things, seeing people, fucking all those other boys (who will be soft and pretty, just like Light...) and girls (who will have tits that he can titty fuck…). L is pretending for Light, Light is pretending for L, and they are both pretending for every one else that they aren't both going to run away from all of this when it is over.

He's rubbing Light's hand with his thumb and Light sighs, tired. It has been a long day, and fuck, the next one is going to be longer. He's ready to sleep. Light pushes L down onto the bed and curls up next to his form, as L put his hands around the teen, holding him and rocking him too. It feels strange, for this to be how they sleep, holding each other like two old lovers, desperate for one last touch before they parted. It was stupid, really, because they had tomorrow, and the next day. They had forever, it felt like, even though Light knew, Light knew that L was going to leave, because L didn't need Light.

Light needs L. Or maybe he just enjoys the idea of L, someone who loves to hold him, who loves to kiss him, who (even with his weird tits fetish) loves Light even if he is a frigid controlling bitch. It was nice. Nice. Not wonderful, but nice, and Light, pretty as he is, could use nice now.

His eyes drooped and his head hit L's chest. "I'm fucking tired…"

"Then fucking sleep." Light wrapped his arms around L's chest, and L keeps thumbing the small of his back. It is calming, and Light almost falls asleep, mumbling softly to himself (and L, maybe L too…).

"It'll suck, you know, when this ends." He's asleep (maybe, pretty much, not really…) as he hears L whispering back;

"Yeah, yeah it will."

the end of part II

a.n. Urgh. I'm soo tired. No sex, maybe in the next part or somethin' like that.

I like the idea that L is probably perfectly normal looking, but looks and talks the way he does just to piss people off. I could see him being Pete Wentz in his next life.

Please Review…


	3. Interlude

Sex

I do not own Death Note.

Warning: This contains sex and alcohol abuse. I do not endorse the obsessive use of alcohol, abuse, or victims condoning the abuse, nor do I condone it.

Interlude: Monsters

Light is used to being thrown around a little. His father used to have a drinking problem, but he toned it down. Not much, but down, so he didn't beat them for every little thing anymore. That is why he thinks he likes it, that is why he doesn't stop L when he downs that third bottle of that awful smelling shit, that liquor. He wants it. He wants that monster to come out and touch him with that bad touch. He wants to be thrown around a bit. Light wants L to be a bad, bad, bad man, just like his father, just like all those other boys, just like all the other ones…

L won't. L tries to be a good man for Light, but Light, Light doesn't want that much. He wants someone who will hold his hand then throw him down. Light wants a man, a terrible frightening man to hold him too tight, whereas L will hold Light gentle, afraid anymore will snap everything in two. His hands can't hit, only when he takes that one more drink, that one more drink that, Light, so sad and wanting and desperate to feel a hand strike him, will let go, will let fall into his mouth. It is that one drink that pushes him to turn to see that beautiful little thing, that blushing boy with his cheap whore lips, puffed out and wishing, and hate it. L doesn't want to hate Light. Light wants it so bad.

You must understand. L is not a bad man. He…just…can't…drink.

Everything falls down. L stands up, swaying, swaying like a man with no sense at all.

"Hey bitch. What the fuck are you doing, sittin' there?" His speech is slurred and something races in Light's heart, skipping, skipping at the clenched fists. He hates being called bitch and stands as well, swaying to his own drunken rhythm.

"Why don't you come and fucking find out dick face?" He laughs until L hits him. A fist, connected with his face. He holds the cheek that caught the impact and a tear begs for release. Now L is laughing and his laugh, it echoes of so many different laughs.

His father's, when his mother told him they were leaving and he threw the bottle at her.

His boyfriend's, when he told him not here, not now, please just stop. The hands did not stop.

His own, as he slipped into maddening sadness, scented of strawberry wine that he stole, thanks to a fake ID and a few finger fucks with the gay cashier.

Light doesn't like that laugh and yet, yet he wants it all the more. He throws a fist back, catching L on his arm. L grabs his arm and pulls him up to his chest. Light grins cheekily and sways, looking up at L with insolence and charm.

"What cha gonna do, big boy?" L grins and held Light's hands tightly, leading him to the bed, pressing down on him like a frightening monster. Is that what Light wants? To fuck with a monster? Isn't Light one monster too many?

Sloppy kisses, god what an ass, trailed everywhere but where Light wants and Light dreams briefly of his lover L who is gone for now. The foreplay is crap and he is almost too relieved when it comes time for the fucking.

L unzips his jeans, tearing Light's clothes off. Light grabs his arm and yanks his flannel jacket off, the undershirt coming off too. L gets the idea and throws his jeans off too. His penis is big, but Light has seen bigger, taken bigger, and yet still hates this part. It is awful, to see that thing there. It is ever so unattractive, the pre-cum leaking and the misshapen-ness of it bothers Light. He knows he has one too, but he just finds penises so ugly. So ugly and yet he is getting fucked by one. Light can't even explain his own logic.

It's in him, and moving. He can hear L groaning from up there, but he's under water now, just that one flash of pleasure every time L isn't drunk enough to miss. He feels the thrusts slowing and then feels a thud. He blinks twice and L is down, asleep and still in mid-thrust. Light groans and slips L out, reaching down and slipping on L's flannel jacket, wrapping it around him for warmth. It is a small comfort, because it still smells like mint and candies, not vodka like the sheets that L has thrown up on. Light gets up and helps L on his feet, supporting him to their other bed room, away from the smell of alcohol and fear and horrible times.

They fall, L a thunk and Light a light poofing noise. He pulls the covers of the both of them, feeling like the mommy, and folds himself into L's arms. L nuzzles his neck subconsciously, mumbling in his ear and laughing. Light hates this. Light loves this. What does Light want?

"I'm gonna protect you, 'kay?" L slurs his words, but he means every single one and Light knows that L can protect from everything but each other. He listens to the beats of L's heart and falls, lonely, to sleep.

A.N. It's just an interlude. I can't think of anything right now.

Please Review…


	4. Part IV

Sex

I do not own Death Note.

Part VI: Nightmares

Light is slowly killing L, killing him with pretty faces and cold kisses. He is taking everything and laughingly throwing it into fire, all that is L is disappearing in to a golden flame. He isn't sure if this makes sense yet, but it will. When Light finally becomes Kira again.

Because he will. L is never ever wrong.

It's just a big old rain cloud above Light's head that L has to watch everyday. Raindrops falling down his face, masking themselves as tears. Light would look at him and they could share a glance that whispered 'We both know I'm lying.'

Sometimes L wonders about what Light did at home. Wonders why such a bright and beautiful young man would throw himself in the arms of men he knew, he knew would treat him in such, such despicable ways. L sees the way his father holds his shoulder, tightly and firmly, like one false move will send Light on the streets. He wishes he could fix that for Light, fix everything.

L wants to fix Light, fix him like a watch or case or toy. Only watches, cases, and toys don't have fathers, or families, or beautiful faces that kissed you when you least expected it and when you wanted it most.

L sometimes thinks that he is the one false move Light makes.

When he kisses Light's neck Light will start to recite poetry. He starts to let out whispers and sighs of Dickenson, Byron, and Shakespeare, recalling the words in his breathy voice, wispy cries of lyric.

L sometimes wishes that Light would stop being afraid of him.

He can see it in Light's eyes. The silent worry, worry about things that will never happen. He hears Light murmuring in his sleep, whispering into his chest about liquor and L and hurt. It puzzles L, because he has never drank in front of Light. He looks like he could cry, but he isn't. What is going on in Light's head?

"What cha' gonna do, big bo…" Light twists and turns in the sheets while L tries to hold him, tries to settle the storm within Light's brain. So turbulent, he doesn't think it will ever stop. L touches Light's head and he turns from the careful fingers of the detective.

His face buries in the pillows. Come out Light, please come out. Recite the words of the masters, sing L a song of unrequited love, please come out. L tries to entice him out with kisses and touches but Light is falling into a nightmare and won't let L take him out.

What is he dreaming, what is he saying in this crazed up version of reality? Who is he, why is he so cruel?

L sometimes thinks that if Light stays his for any longer, he too will fall in to madness. He is inciting the fires of passion, the cold and lonely ruins that fall in L's mind when he without Light are awful, awful like before. L can't do it. He can't be with all this mess of emotion. Underneath this beautiful boy is a destructive piece of machinery, crying on him to help, please L, please L, don't leave me. It is killing Light and slowly, slowly killing everyone around him.

L can see. A detective's eyes, they never lie, never are fooled. He sees, he…sees.

Light sobs into the pillow, reaches for L's hand, which L can't stop from holding Light's. He holds this shattered glass human, rocks him back and forth trying to make him better. He can't, he knows. He's a detective, for solving puzzles and not humans. Humans are puzzles.

Light is a broken doll. He is no puzzle.

"We're not going to be this forever. We're not going to be the falling apart thing that we are forever, I promise you Light."

He wants to promise Light the world, a cure, something to make the shakes and shivers go. He's never felt this before. He's never cared. Light makes people care, he makes them care and kiss him, want and destroy him, tear and repair him. Light, Light, Light.

He doesn't love him. He loves…the sex. He is honest. He loves having sex with Light, not Light. Light deserves a man who will care even after he's cum inside him. L, L can't bring himself to do that. He can't answer the cries that Light is issuing.

L can only hold Light, and hope for the best.

"I'm going to protect you, okay? If you can even hear me Light, please, I'm going to protect you."

He can't love him, but he can protect him, keep him safe from all the bad that may be coming (is coming). He can hold him and touch him and keep him company, safe, but lonely, company. Just until he falls asleep.

A.N. The accompaniment to the interlude.

Don't worry. I've got more planned.

Please review…


End file.
